Paranoid

Nothing much funnier than watching my little OCD routine before class every weekday. Pull car into parking space, usually at a perfect diagonal. Turn off radio. Turn off heater. Turn off lights. Remove key from ignition. Turn knob again to make sure radio is completely off. Check heater. Double-check to make sure the knob controlling lights is turned to “off,” but don’t trust it. Turn lights on and then off again to reassure myself. Make sure brights aren’t on. Attempt to turn them on to see the comparison, then think of unicorns or something else absurd while turning them off so I can remind myself later. Climb out of car, lock front door, grab stuff from backseat. Look back to make sure front door is locked, then lock back door as well. Start toward building, keeping keys in my hand so I know I haven’t forgotten them. Halfway to the door, run back and check the lights. Arrive late to zero hour. Again.